BSNYC Fiday Frun Quiz!

This weekend the Spring Classics begin in earnest with the Tour of Flanders, and the excitement is palpable. ("Palping" is similar to "rocking," or "running," or "rubbing.") One of the most exciting things about the Spring Classics is that riders often palp more traditional wheels and equipment due to the rough cobblestones (except for George Hincapie, who palped crabon wheels at Paris-Roubaix last year with disastrous results.) For this reason, the Tour of Flanders is what's known as a "cobbled classic," and should not be confused with the crappy conversions on Craigslist and Fixedgeargallery, which are actually cobbled-together "classics."

In any case, if you're looking forward to the Tour of Flanders or to the weekend in general, I'd like to dampen your enthusiasm by presenting you with a quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right, you'll know. If you're wrong, you'll see someone playing an ear-splitting guitar solo on a heaven-sent asterisk.

Palp you bike safely this weekend, and thanks for reading.

--BSNYC/RTMS

1) According to Shimano, there is such a thing as "increased levels of perfection."

--True
--False

2) What do these two things have in common?

--Lots of colors

--They are both named "Ritchey"

--Loose balls

--They're both idiots

3) Clip-on plastic fenders that almost touch the rear tire are the flat hat brim of 2009:

--True

--False

4) Cincinnati police are currently on the lookout for a man who stole which unwieldy item and then made his getaway on a bicycle?

--A flat-screen TV

--A gasoline-powered lawnmower

--A Vespa scooter

--Another bicycle

5) This rider, spotted in London, might benefit from which real-life exciting new product?

--Pedro's Handlebar Levelizer

--Stroke's Extra Leg
--Park's Fixed-Gear Colorway Coordination Chart
--iPhone's "Should I Go Out In Public?" App

6) What are the two big plastic things on the front of this bicycle, also spotted in London?

--High-powered headlights
--Tupperware, as this is the owner's ironic cake-fetching bike
--Intergalactic space breasts
--Together with the previous photo, a sign that London's cyclists may be going crazy





7) The message on this headband most likely means that:

--The wearer's head has been repaired via the cranial screwtop method of entry into the brain, pioneered by Dr. Michael Hfuhruhurr
--The wearer has been spayed or neutered
--The wearer believes that Barack Obama's election has effectively repaired (or "fixed") the United States
--The wearer likes fixed-gear bicycles




8) What does this tattoo depict?

--A disc brake rotor that has been thrown with ninja-like accuracy into the wearer's leg
--A delicious disc brake rotor pita bread sandwich
--An extreme close-up of a woman giving birth to a disc brake rotor
--It is impossible to determine with any certainty what this tattoo depicts

***Special Fill-In-The-Blank Knuckle Tattoo Bonus Question***

This is one half of a set of knuckle tattoos. What does the other half say?

--nutz
--ebra
--appa
--ygomorphic